I have often wondered what it would be like to believe so fully in a religion. To know, in any situation, that everything would be okay because you had God on your side protecting you. I feel like, by not believing in God at all, I'm missing out on some secret joy that everyone but me has.
Like, when I used to see christians or whatever, I just thought they were stupid because they didnt get that our universe is just made up of atoms and all we are going to do in our life is live and die, but now, I envy them. I envy the way that whenever they are in the dark, whenever they are lost, they have a friend to lead them out of it. And even though it may only be fake, or an illusion, it is more than I have.
Because when I’m lost I only have myself to pick up the pieces.
Anyway. I'm going to stop being deep and overly thinking-y and go eat some pizza.
I.am.so.hungry.
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