Football Crowds- Aren't they delicious?

I am never going to the football again.

Seriously.

I mean, I have nothing wrong with the actual game, but it's like 90 percent of the footy crowd are angry, bitter people or the mentally disturbed.

Picture this.

I'm sitting at the footy, St Kilda vs Collingwood, and am having a pretty intense time watching Collingwood (my team) play. I'm focused. I'm in 'my zone.' And then suddenly, two jerks behind me start screaming out abuse at collingwood.

Travis Cloke was a skill-less retard. Didak was a turd. Davis was a fuckwit.

And they were screaming it too.

Every time Travis Cloke got the ball it was; "OHHH LOOK WHOS GOT IT TRAVIS THE TURD, HERES A TURNOVER COMING. WHAT A SKILL-LESS RETARD."

Eventually, as the game progressed, they decided to stick with the turd insult.

This meant everyone was a turd.

I was a turd, collingwood was a turd, the crowd was a turd. Even the st kilda players were turds.

Luckily, I found comfort in the fact that they were both quickly losing their voices, so every time they shouted something out their voices started breaking or dying out, leaving their insults weak and kinda lame.

But this wasnt all.

To my left, I also had gibberish guy.

For the entire game, at around 15 second intervals he would string a few random syllables together and say them quietly to himself, combined with a shaking of the head in amazement.

Every time he did this, I kept frantically looking back to the game, searching for what he found so crazy and utterly unbelievable, but there was nothing out of the ordinary happening.

Then, in front of me, there was the average collingwood idiot.

This meant the usual annoying stuff, like shouting out collingwood every few moments to somehow spur on his team, or jumping up in elation whenever we marked the ball or got a goal. He also had a stupid habit of constantly trying to start collingwood clapping chants. Needless to say, he was the only one participating in them.

Between the two agressive idiots behind me, the gibberish guy, the collingwood supporter and the fact that my team got thrashed, I'm pretty sure next week I'll be watching the hawthorn game from the comfort of my own home.

Its easier that way.