I hate it when you're on a train and you randomly start crying

Guess I can't say I don't cry in public anymore.
It was, really, never a good idea to start listening to sad folk music when I'm in an equally depressing mood anyway, especially on public transport.
It was, really, never a good idea to hope one little bit.
People should stop hoping. They should stop dreaming. Because existence is already sucky enough without having to live knowing living could be better.
You suck. I hate you. You lie to me. And you pretend you care that I exist. When you don't. And honestly, you should really go fuck yourself. Because I'm sick of wanting you to acknowledge me. And I'm sick of you pretending you acknowledge me. And I'm even more sick of remembering we were ever anything close to friends in the first place. Because we were. And I wish we weren't. And I wish I'd never met you.
Because you destroyed me.
And I hate you more than her even.
Because you really are shameless.
And this would all be so different if you just fucking talked to me. But you can't. And you don't care about me. And that'd all be fine if you could admit it so I could get the fuck on with my life without you. Why do I keep hoping you want to know me?
Life would be different if I didn't suck as a person.
Life would be different if I was interesting. Or cool. Or funny. Or even slightly attractive.
I can't help but think nobodys going to remember me once I'm gone.
I can't help but think I'm not going to remember you all either.